Farewell 2009...
Welcome 2010... nice to meet you

Its a whole new year, a new beginning...
oh well... can't help sounding so 'not excited'
the first day, im down with cold/flu..
what came on my mind was, it that a bad sign?
............................................
oh lord.... what am i thinking.... am i emo?
no way!!! I CANNOT BE.

Anyway, my resolution for 2010 will be...
okay, it the same as last year...
something newly added to the list....

'BE HARDWORKING'
'BE OPTIMISTIC'
'GROW UP'(both mentally and physically)
'HAVE PASSION'(in life)
'FIND MY TRUE LOVE'(what with this?)

okay, i want to start searching now, i dont care anymore(too young for this? concentrade on studies?) fuck it. I dont wanna end up living alone for the rest of my life.. i wanna have a family, i wanna have kids.. but i wont get married with anybody on the street, i will find the right one.. of course, love is a belief i'd always remember that..

wow im shocked, maybe being optimistic ain't really hard. HOORAY!

i realised something , its as if im talking to myself writing all this....
do i have double personality? am i emo?
yes you do.... kelvin, yes you are......
oh lord, im going crazier crazier crazier.......

feels like... my hair's longer

nowaday's spinning around Eunice..

oh hey, this could be something

when is it time?

Another day passed.... I slept through it....
Oh lord.... HOW CAN ANYONE NOT ENJOY A WHOLE DAY OF NAP?
hahah...

I LOVE YOU KELVIN KU!
and im so so sooooo infatuated with you...
You're my no.1 in this world...
Nobody will ever ever EVER replace you....
I cant live without you for even 1 second....
So,... tell me, can you treat me any better....??

Oh master KELVIN!
You're a sick gay in love with ownself bastard

HELL YEAH i am .......
SPIDERMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

today i googled for " how to love yourself "
google is always our good friend :)
this may be helpful for some low self esteem...
talking about low self es.... (PeggyC hit me straight in the head)
found this.... here goes....

How To Love Yourself In 17 Ways

Step 1 (refer to above if you don't know how to start)
Fall in love with yourself. Think about what makes you You. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you see and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect. This does not meant that you do not learn to change from your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself for all your flaws. Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is You.

Step 2
Eliminate Self Criticism. Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest thing? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good because you are stupid or make mistakes. If you find that you criticise yourself often, make an effort to stop the self criticism.

Step 3 (Yes, optism is good)
Be Kind And Positive. When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself just grows. Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday, while in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.

Step 4
Acknowledge Your Effort. It’s not always about winning or having success in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that you’ve done your best, even if you have failed to produce tangible results.

Step 5
Let Go Of Worry. Loving yourself requires you to let go of your worry. It is a horrible way to live a life filled with constant worrying. I can attest to that! Worry does not help in any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Only wise actions can! So instead of worrying, spend time thinking about what you can do to help in the situation. If the situation is beyond your control, then ask the Universe for your desired outcome and let things work out on their own. Things will come to be, if they are meant to be. (Really...?)

Step 6
Trust Yourself. Have confidence in your abilities. Know that you have the ability to make important changes for yourself, for as long as you put your heart to it. You can also support yourself by visualizing desired outcomes.

Step 7
Forgive Yourself. If you have made mistakes in the past that had caused you to feel less worthy, then you need to forgive yourself. All of us make mistakes; so there really is no need to beat yourself up over them. Or if you’ve been carrying around a baggage of emotional hurt because of a childhood trauma, learn to forgive yourself that it is not your fault.

Step 8
Be Truthful To Yourself. Loving yourself requires you to be truthful about your own feelings. If you are happy, acknowledge the joy. If you are sad, acknowledge the sorrow. When you are truthful about your feelings, you do not try to lie to yourself or seek to bury your negative emotions. Instead, acknowledging what you feel provides a good guide to what your thoughts are. And as we all know, thoughts can be changed, so that healing and self growth can take place.

Step 9
Grow Spiritually. When you spend time growing spiritually, loving yourself is an automatic thing. You become more peaceful, connected, kind, loving and compassionate. You nurture a mind that grows more beautiful by the day. How to not love yourself in the process?

Step 10
Make Positive Affirmations Everyday. Post affirmations that can help raise your self esteem everyday. For instance, say this to yourself “I love and accept myself completely and unconditionally.” Read your affirmations out loud several times a day.

Step 11
Express Gratitude. Express gratitude for the person that you are. For instance, cultivate an appreciation for your strengths and gifts. Also, feel a sense of gratitude that you are alive and well, and fully capable of making a difference in your life.

Step 12 (Im closer to reality...)
Nurture Your Dreams. Why deny yourself your dreams? When you nurture your dreams, you would love the life that you are leading. Every moment that you live is a joy because you are expressing yourself fully.

Step 13
Boost Your Self Confidence. Make a deliberate attempt to look for opportunities that can help improve your sense of Self. For instance, if you are particularly good at doing something, set aside more time to indulge and improve your skills on it. Knowing that you have particular gifts can boost your self esteem.

Step 14(yea... sleep well...)
Relax. You need to give yourself space to take breaks every now and then. If you spend your time working, without paying attention to your health, it also means that you do not love yourself well enough to take care of your own body. Fill your time with silence, soothing music and visions of beauty; anything that nourishes your Soul.

Step 15
Have Fun. Inject some fun into your life. Life is meant to be an enjoyable. Don’t take life or yourself too seriously. If you can think of life in this manner, you automatically relax and quit worrying over things that do not matter.

Step 16
Look After Your Body. It is important that you strengthen yourself with proper nutrition and regular exercise. Your body is a temple and you should treat it with respect, love and care. It has been found that the lack of self love is often the root causes of conditions like eating disorders, obesity or even terminal diseases.

Step 17 (this is crazy)
Learn To See Beauty. When you learn to see beauty in every thing, you will also see beauty in yourself. Hence, stop to smell the flowers. Notice everything. Feel everything. The pink blush of the flowers in your garden, the greeness of the plains, the whisper of the gentle wind, or the myraid hues of an evening sky.

When you make a decision to love yourself, you are really saying that you want to come alive. You accept that you are responsible for the outcomes that you experience in your life and would like yourself to shine from living a fulfilling life.

Reflection. (the coolest!)

“I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it — I own everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By so doing, I can love me and be friendly with all my parts. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know — but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me.

I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay.”

today i googled for " how to forget someone you love "
hah, pretty funny isn't it.. im like making fun of myself recently...
anyway, this could be helpful for some people.

something i totally agree with is
it all depends on yourself....

here goes,

after you realised it's over.............

So now what? Are you going to sit and cry for the rest of your life or do you intend to do something? Was that ending your fault or are you not the one to blame? Is there something you can do to fix it? Is there something you should stop and think about so you can act in a better way the next time round? There are many things you can do to heal a broken heart.....

Step 1
Cry out everything you have to cry about! When we get hurt, it's normal (and good) to cry. Don't ever think you're being weak for crying and don't feel embarrassed because of it! It's normal and it's good! When you cry, you let go of part of your anger and hurt so you can feel less heavy. You can lock yourself in a room, if you want to, and put on some sad music...but let yourself feel the pain and cry so you can let it go. The main thing here is: Get rid of the pain! Just let her go!

Step 2
Get busy! When you're trying to get someone out of your head, you need to put other things inside of it. In other words...get busy! It doesn't matter how, you just need to get distracted. Go to a movie, watch a play, travel. It doesn't matter what are you going to do--the important thing is to find something to do. Find a hobby, find something you enjoy doing, something to keep your mind busy. If your mind is busy, it doesn't have time or space to think about the person you're trying to forget.

Step 3
Spend some time with your friends. Friends are always great to have in this kind of situation! Friends can make you feel good about yourself and get you distracted very easily. They will certainly make you laugh and make you see that you're way more important than you think! The only warning is: Ask them not to talk about the person you're trying to forget. If they start bringing the topic up in every conversation, you won't be able to forget, and instead of making you laugh, they're going to make you cry. So be honest and ask them not to talk about it!

Step 4
Avoid the person! Try not to go to places you know you can meet that person. When you're trying to forget someone and you two keep seeing each other, it gets hard to get over it. If you meet him/her somewhere, just be nice and kind, but find an excuse to go away as fast as you can! If you work or study with him/her and you can't avoid seeing him/her, just try not to look and not to talk too much. Just be gentle and keep busy all the time so you won't have excuses to look at him/her or to chat.

Step 5 (I Think so too.)
Go out and see some different faces! Being at home gives you more time to think about it, which makes the process even more difficult. So even if you're not feeling excited or you're in a bad mood, just put on your best clothes, best shoes, best smile, call some friends and go somewhere nice where you can dance, drink, listen to some music. And the most important: See some different faces! When you go out, you notice that the person you're trying to forget is not the only one who's got a perfect smile and an amazing voice...thank god, there are other interesting people around the world, too!

Step 6 (hmmmm, i wonder......)
Avoid every kind of romantic thing! If you're trying to forget someone, you'd better not watch romantic movies or listen to romantic songs...it makes you feel bad and you will certainly remember the person you're trying to get rid of. It doesn't matter if it's a song you love or if it's playing on the radio...just change the station or do something else! Put on some happy songs, dancing songs, watch some comedies, terror movies, whatever...you just need to avoid the romantic things for now!

Step 7 (Well, its good to be vain!)
Take good care of yourself. Women tend to run for some kind of self-destruction when they're hurt. If we break up our perfect relationship, then we have no reason to get our nails done anymore and the only thing that gives us comfort is chocolate and sugar. That way, the only thing we do is to become less attractive and lessen our self-confidence. So if you're hurt, just try to use your pain for yourself instead of against you. Go to the gym, work out a lot, get your nails and hair done...do whatever you can so you can feel more pretty and confident!

Step 8
Accept the process! You can be really strong and it's still going to hurt. The process takes time and you have to accept that! You can't hope to forget in 2 days someone you loved for 2 years...and you can't pretend to be strong if you feel like crying. Just face your pain and accept that it's not easy and it's going to take some time. When you're patient with yourself and your situation, things tend to get easier...

Well, of course, forgetting someone is not easy to do nor is it easily explained in just 8 steps. But there are some things that make the process a lot smoother. As I said, it takes time and it's hard but I'm sure you can do it! The only thing that is really, really important is: It all depends on you! Don' ever forget that! If you want to forget someone, then you will, there is no doubt! Even if it takes a long time, even if you have to be really strong...you will be! In that kind of situation we usually find out that we are a lot stronger than we give ourselves credit for! So believe that. Believe that, take a deep breath and move on! Your life's waiting for you, baby! (what's with the 'baby!' at the end....)

trying to be optimistic helps alot too....
good luck folks...... and kelvin
WE CAN DO IT!!!

Is it me or is this over,
As i got sober, watch you fade away,,,,,,

no, its not because of that game
i swear its not...
didn't i call you?
no i didn't...
tell you something,
and its true.
i will not say i wanted to call you every minute
there should be at least 10 times in 24hours
sometimes i think im sick...
and the dreams,
they are disturbing

Spiderman, spiderman,
does whatever a spider can,
spins a web, any size,
catches thieves, just like flies,
LOOK OUT!
Here comes the spidermannnnnn

hahah, i miss spiderman

Not a second chance

Looking at me now you can tell
That my new relationship ain't going well.
There's no reason my name should come up on your cell.
Unless i'm unhappy, but that shouldn't be the case.
Cause I said, said she was the one baby yes I said,
Said I were in love, cause...

When you left me, you said that you wouldn't be
Coming back, remember that, but I never agreed.
I hate to say it but you told me so,
Told me if you left, that I were goin be miserable.
Cause she don't do it like you,
Or else I wouldn't be
Running back to the past
It was you that left me

I hate to say it but I know you're right
Everytime I run I comin for you late at night.
But right now I ain't got you.
Tell me where i'm gonna be,
Cause you can't take me back,
No, your heart won't let me.

Girl, you know he can't touch like I do,
I don't see you trippin or flippin over his moves.
It don't take a genius to see he ain't that dude.
But you let him back,
I don't know what you was on when I said,
Said she was the one, baby yes I said,
Said I were in love, cause...

When you left me, you said that you wouldn't be
Coming back, remember that, but I never agreed.
I hate to say it but you told me so,
Told me if you left, that I were goin be miserable.
Cause she don't do it like you,
Or else I wouldn't be
Running back to the past
It was you that left me

I hate to say it but I know you're right
Everytime I run I comin for you late at night.
But right now I ain't got you.
Tell me where i'm gonna be,
Cause you can't take me back,
No, your heart won't let me.

If there are hard times it seems,
But I ain't gettin no sympathy,
No baby not from you,
Cause I told you you should never leave.
See me chose this road
So I gotta go it alone
Remember you told me so.

Second Chance.



What a fake story.

Today, i forget how to breathe.

Right or wrong? Good or bad?

Is the righteous always good?
Is the evil always bad?
Ugly, dirty, = wrong?
Beautiful, pure, = good?

When i was right, i couldn't be even wrong
When i was good, i couldn't be even worse

I hate philosophy, but i'm after it.
And i dont think people who go fishing seek fish.

To my best friend,

i dont know why, nothing much is good about you. Maybe you dont even know, maybe it's in your personality. But one point i like, seriously like, is that you're always there.. You're like, a railing when climbing the stairs. Hard, metal, but always there for you..

Thanks.. best friend

Today, just feel like dedicating this song to everyone.. its a old, yet powerful love song. just wanna say, dare to love...
Enjoy

Hi, my name is SCRUMP!


The righteous themselves will possess the earth, and they will reside forever upon it.